Update

Thanks, everybody, for the kind words. We have seen this coming for a while. But until she hits this point, there is not a lot that can be done to help because she doesn't think she needs it.

Yesterday she wore Mom out. My sister-in-law and I did dinner/desert so Mom didn't have to. Dinner was waiting when she got home with the 2 kids and their stuff. We helped unload the car and get things set up. Earlier in the day my brother-in-law had brought the crib. He recognizes that this will not be a short term situation.

Some of what Mom and BIL went through:

• She was completely ignoring the kids
• She wouldn't bathe which is VERY unlike her - she is usually dressed to the "T", make-up and hair perfect
• She would talk obsessively about what she had done (won't go into that) and that the police were coming to get her (there is no reason...just paranioa)
• When not talking, she would look off into space

They finally got her to the doctor around noon and the doctor agreed that she needed admission. But. There was no open room on the psych floor. They finally called around 3 today - which meant BIL had a rough night of listening to her.

Today I went over to Mom's to help her out. She needed to sort through what she brought to see what she still needed. About noon, Little Sister decided she needed to see her kids. So BIL brought her over. Truth be told, I think BIL just needed a break, because she ignored the kids unless they were shoved in her face. But I don't begrudge him that break. He SO needed it. But by this afternoon she was trying to convince us she was fine and didn't need to go to the hospital. Um, too bad and none of us are stupid. She tried to keep talking to me and I had to tell her that the didn't need to be talking about this in front of her 3 year old daughter.

Anyway, she is where she needs to be, safe, getting the help she needs. And maybe THIS time she will stay on her meds. Maybe. But probably not.

Why???

Why are people that are not capable of caring for themselves perfectly able to have child after child?

Yet again, my sister has gone off the rails leaving her husband and my parents to deal with the mess. She is being committed today. Again. Thoughts and statements of suicide. I know she can’t help what goes on in her brain. But she knows that medication helps and she refuses to take it. And knowing that she had these problems, she had 2 children that are innocent. One is 3 and very smart and intuitive– she knows exactly what is going on around her. The other isn’t a year old yet. Oh, and mom found an ovulation kit by her computer today. So is she planning number 3???

So, as my mom and brother-in-law make plans to hospitalize my sister, my sister-in-law and I make plans to help my parents care for the 2 kids. I’m sure this isn’t what mom and dad had in mind when they retired. But we are all lucky that they are healthy and glad to help.

My trip...

Well, I'm back. Spent last night in Atlanta seeing Hurricane Bells, Start of Track and Field and BLUE OCTOBER!

Char and I had an amazing time! A relaxing drive, a beautiful, quaint hotel, an incredible dinner and the concert. It was a much needed break. And I'm so glad she was there with me - she tends to push me to do things that I normally wouldn't do. Like hang around the bus and get pics with all the band memebers! We got 3 pretty quick, but we had to wait for the lead singer. A long time. But it was so worth it. He signed our tickets and took a picture. They were all very nice and laid back about all the fan stuff. Anyway, it was everything I wanted and more!

And yes, I look scared to death...but part of that is lack of visible brows....
Back to work tomorrow....

Boys will be boys...

A growing boy...

I'm hoping that tonight I will have a little time to post some pictures fromt his weekend. We took a weekend trip to visit family and had a blast! Some things I learned:

1. I need sunscreen, but not much, when it's 70 degrees and sunny. We sat by the pool all day (5 hours) and I didn't even get pink, except for the few places I didn't get sunscreen. Apparently, SPF 8 was more than I needed.
2. Evan (11 yrs old) is now old enough to get a girl's phone number. A 13 year old girl. Whom he promptly ignored after getting said number.
3. Boys will play barefoot in the sand and water even when it is 50 degrees. They just can't resist.
4. Boys will climb trees even if the tree branches out over Mobile Bay and there is a very good chance they will fall into the freezing water.
5. Short hair is awesome. I may never let it grow out again. I never would have cut it this short by choice...and it may not be the best look for me. But I don't care. 5 second hair care is under-rated.
6. Giving Evan a cell phone has made things so much easier and so much harder at the same time.

Dude, where's my money?

Long ago, in the dark ages, there was a girl who was a band geek. Ok, it was me. I loved being in the band, despite the social stigma. Ok, the stigma really wasn't bad for me, but it was for a lot of people. It never stopped me from dating or having friends outside the band, but the stereotypical band geeks had a hard time socializing. We worked hard all summer to perfect our half-time show. We competed in marching competitions. When that was over, we practiced for hours on symphonic band - we also competed with that. And once a year, we took a trip to compete somewhere out of state. One year it was Panama City Beach, FL. One year Chattanooga, TN. And we paid dearly for these trips. We did fundraiser after fundraiser. Washed cars, sold doughnuts, sold wrapping paper. We worked. And all profits went to offset the cost of the trip. And whatever we didn't raise, we (or our parents) paid. But we worked so hard, that the costs to our families were minimal.

Fastforward to today. I work for a pretty large company. We have an electronic 'bulletin board'. Glamour Girl knows what I'm talking about. It's a pretty neat tool. If you lose something, a ring, a watch, earring, whatever, you can put up a little post and hopefully someone will find it and return it. If you are having to do a school/scout fundraiser, just post it out there and interested people will make a purchase. If you are participating in a marathon to raise money for whatever cause is near and dear, post it and people will donate.

Today I was picking through it and found a post that just pissed me off. This is not a rant against social programs - believe me, I know those are needed. So don't twist what I'm about to say into me being 'anti-helping people out'. I believe in working for what you want. So when I came across a post asking for donations to fund a student's $6,500 trip to Europe (Spain, France, Italy) I was shocked. When did students start asking total strangers to just donate cash? Is this the norm? He may have participated in fundraisers, but that was not mentioned. Just a straight out request for cash.

I honestly believe that kids who are given everything lose the ability and will to work for things on their own. What is he learning if people just hand him cash in exchange for nothing?

A ray of sunshine

OK, I had this whole fabulous post about snow with pics and everything. And I lost it. So. Screw it. On to another subject. Oh, and as part of my solution to the previous posts...Miss Grace reminded me about parental controls. I'm so slow sometimes.

I've always loved music. Always. And I've always had a few bands that just rocked my little world. But. Nothing has ever made me as happy as Blue October. I found them at a time in my life when I was a little down. Depressed. They have a song for every situation, every mood I have. And really, how can I resist that face?

But last March when they released their latest CD, Approaching Normal, there was one song that just blew me away. See, that's when I was diagnosed with breast cancer. And I needed an anthem in a bad way. Because with the right soundtrack, I can deal with anything. They delivered. Jump Rope (lyrics below). It set my attitude. It reminded me on a daily basis that things suck, but I can deal with it. Make the choice to deal. The end. No moping, no pity party. Well, maybe a pity party here or there. But they had to be short.


And that's when I decided if they EVER came close to B'ham, I was going.

So I'm going.

To Atlanta, GA. On April 7, a friend and I are going for a girl's night out. Tickets purchased, hotel booked. It's something fun to look forward to - and it came at the perfect time!

Here is a link to the song on Youtube...


Lyrics:
Remember how you used to say
You couldn't wait till tomorrow for a brand new day?
And no fuss when you had to ride the bus
You just add a little blush
To paralyze your school crush


Now you're older and the weight is on your shoulder
Make the world a little colder
No more hiding in the old day
Be strong
Don't you give up hope
It will get hard
Life's like a jump rope


Up, downUp, downUp, downUp, down, yeah
'Cause it will get hard
Remember life's like a jump rope
Up, downUp, downUp, downUp, down, yeah
It will get hard
'Cause it will get hard


There'll be a bump and there will be a bruise
There'll be alarms and there will be a snooze
There'll be a path that you will have to choose
There'll be a win and there will be a lose and
You gotta hold your head up high and
Watch all the negative go by
Don't ever be ashamed to cry
You go ahead
'Cause life's like a jump rope


I want to tell you that everything will be okay
That everything will eventually turn itself to gold
So keep pushing through it all
Don't follow, lead the way
Don't lose yourself or your hope
'Cause life's like a jump rope


You stomp your feet so hard you make it pound
Raise the bottom to the top
And now we're never coming down
Up, down, stomp your feet spin around
Clap hands to the rhythm
Then you slip down